Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Type in media for the Burning River sports. Cast enie meany Mighty Moe. Catch a Miles Garrett by his dislocated toe. New rules, same problems. At least it's over for this year. And now on to the biggest spectacle in sports entertainment. The Super Bowl is finally here. The reason everyone plays and everyone watches. So grab your personal latrines, because the line to the wash closet will be long after all of that smoked gouda fondue and buffalo and surprise. And we will break it all down for you next on The Burning River Sportscast.
Yeah, only they can get not effed.
[00:01:03] Speaker B: From the old, I'm flailing my arms and I happen to punch you in the dick. I'm so hard right now, y'all just don't know shit.
[00:01:13] Speaker A: We don't call her Tuna for nothing.
[00:01:16] Speaker B: The best part about this whole event was when it was over.
[00:01:20] Speaker A: I think I just sat on my nut.
[00:01:24] Speaker B: Avocados from Mexico just put an ad in our show.
[00:01:29] Speaker A: Good job.
[00:01:30] Speaker B: He's the guy. I know we just talked about him punching everyone in the dick, but let's bring him in so he can punch other teams in the dick. There's so many times that I said punch in the dick.
[00:01:42] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, getting punching the dick is never good.
Welcome into the Birding River sportscast presented by Tapin'media I'm Kenny Thunder, the fattest co host on this pod. Seated beside, apparently Ronnie. Ronnie's doing his own introduction today. Seated beside the man who once converted a nun into the world's largest religious OnlyFans creator, who can only climax to ephesians, the only man who can ride all four horses of the apocalypse, blasphemer in chief, Red Hot Ronnie Jams. He's lost. Can't even we're going to have to give a minute. Take a minute. And then, Ronnie, after you had a minute, tell our friends where they can find the holiest Browns podcast out there.
[00:02:23] Speaker B: Listen, you can find our podcast wherever you get your podcast. I'm talking Apple Podcasts, spotify Stitcher, google Podcasts. Amazon Music. Pandora iHeartRadio Podcast castor and so much more. I lost it because you instantly went at all of our friends from down there in the Cincinnati area that hated you. And the main comeback on our Cincinnati Is Trash video was, well, you're fat.
[00:02:44] Speaker A: At least I'm not fat.
[00:02:45] Speaker B: Yeah, a good one. Thank you.
Like he doesn't know, clearly.
[00:02:52] Speaker A: But anyways, I mean, I've called myself fat on this podcast, like, 18 times.
[00:02:55] Speaker B: Since, I think at least once an episode.
[00:02:57] Speaker A: Yeah, pretty much.
[00:02:59] Speaker B: But anyways, before we get started, one of the biggest news stories this past week was the Chinese reconnaissance balloon that was hovering over the US. For about a week. China says it was a weather balloon that was blown off course. Venezuela agrees because they have one now, too. And the Pentagon came out and said, no, it's not. We know this is a surveillance balloon, but for some reason, they refused to shoot it out of the sky. For several days due to safety concerns.
But they did finally shoot it out of the sky off the coast of the Carolinas on February 4 at 02:39 P.m., after it had been over us for about a week, give or take. So, I mean, who knows what kind of information they got, but what all they surveilled there's that so what were your thoughts on this?
[00:03:47] Speaker A: This was the most bizarre story of all time.
[00:03:51] Speaker B: A lot of good memes came out of this.
[00:03:53] Speaker A: So let's think about this. The balloon comes out of Alaska, through Canada and into, like, Montana, and we immediately say, this is definitely not a weather balloon. It's a spy balloon, but we're going to just let it track the entire country.
[00:04:14] Speaker B: Let's do it.
And the rationale they possibly fly over, that could be classified.
[00:04:22] Speaker A: Who knows? I mean, who knows what they're doing. But just bizarre because it was like one of those things where it was like, if there's somebody spying on us, we should probably shoot it down regardless.
[00:04:32] Speaker B: Of if there's any ill intent or not.
It's not a weather balloon.
[00:04:36] Speaker A: I think by nature of it being a spy balloon, there's ill intent because you didn't just call us and say, hey, do you mind if we just fly over your country and take pictures?
[00:04:46] Speaker B: Here's my favorite thing. They said it was a weather balloon. Venezuela is like, yeah, I think it's a weather balloon.
But what better way to spy on somebody to be like because their rationale was, why would we go back to technology from the spy on you? What better way to spy on someone than with 1940s technology to say, yeah, why would we use that?
[00:05:08] Speaker A: Yeah, it sounds like a Netflix plot. Like, that's how the next World War starts. But more importantly, just super bizarre because this balloon is flying up overhead. Everybody's seeing it, taking pictures, making memes everybody knows it's a Chinese spy balloon.
[00:05:22] Speaker B: I know it looks small down here on the ground, but that thing's massive.
[00:05:24] Speaker A: No, they said the payload was the size of a small airplane, two school buses. Yeah, it was big. So it was so big that they didn't want to blow it up over land because they were afraid, again, why we didn't just vaporize this thing. They were afraid it might have contained explosives because they didn't know they had.
[00:05:46] Speaker B: To wait for it to get over a large body of water.
[00:05:48] Speaker A: So that's what's so bizarre, right, is that the rationale they gave for why we waited to blow this up was simply that was that it was getting over a large body of water. The grid that they could collect, the vaporized balloon parts, they would have been more likely to survive a fall into the water, which kind of just doesn't make sense to me anyway, because we shot it with a missile.
[00:06:13] Speaker B: Well, and things that are made of metal, like they sink in the ocean they sink.
[00:06:19] Speaker A: Here's the best part. When they went to recover, the pieces of the balloon sunk. Well, it hadn't sunk right away, but over the course of the next day, the water was way too rough for them to even go in and get the pieces of the balloon. So, yeah, now they just have divers down there trying to find pieces of like it was in Montana and Idaho. The thing could have had six nukes on it. What are you blowing up? There was nothing there. They could have killed it on day one, and it would have landed in a vast, open nothingness, and you could have collected all the pieces. Instead, we waited to blow it up over a body of water, because it would survive more likely in a body of water than on the ground. And then the water was too rough.
[00:06:56] Speaker B: To even go get you know, if there's two things that the US. Government is known for, it's their brains and know.
[00:07:06] Speaker A: Yeah. Here's the other thing that really bothered me about this story, maybe a third one.
[00:07:10] Speaker B: They're so quick to act was it.
[00:07:13] Speaker A: Instantly became politicized to where I had one side of the aisle saying, oh, my gosh, we're under attack by China. And the other side was like, are you scared of a weather balloon? And I'm like, Guys, the government itself is saying it's a spy balloon. It's not that we're being attacked by China, but can we just all get on the same page? This probably isn't a great idea. Why does that have to be politically, you guys are scared of a balloon. China is attacking right now. Guys, somewhere in the middle.
[00:07:41] Speaker B: Neither of those things. It's just we probably should get rid of this balloon so it doesn't surveil our is my question. Who does China think they are?
[00:07:50] Speaker A: That's a great know, I don't want to go down the whole illuminati rabbit hole here, but there was also a number of stories printed about I guess it's the Yawn. Is that I'm saying that correctly? The Yawn competing for digital or not digital, the world global reserve currency, kind of simultaneously as all this is going on. So China's spying on us. They want to take the dollar out of the global world reserve currency so that everything's run on the Yawn, or at least a bi monetary policy where it's the Yawn and the dollar. It's kind of geopolitical weird stuff happening. But here's my final question about this.
[00:08:29] Speaker B: Is a layman that means nothing.
[00:08:31] Speaker A: If we had flown our spy balloon to China and the first day that it hit China, what do you think.
[00:08:39] Speaker B: Happens to it gets blown up?
[00:08:41] Speaker A: Do you think they're waiting for it to traverse? Instantly blown up the entire, like with.
[00:08:46] Speaker B: The Great wall of mean? It's just kind of interesting. Like, you even I don't even care about the politics, the whole thing. I just thought it was a crazy story. It was fascinating to watch that country just be fascinated mesmerized by balloon a friggin balloon for over a week. And now there's a new one spotted over Latin America as of February 3.
[00:09:06] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. And that's confirmed. The Chinese government's already said, like, yeah, it's out there. Yeah, but it's another weather balloon.
[00:09:12] Speaker B: It's just another weather balloon. They always get blown off course, those sons of bitches.
[00:09:16] Speaker A: Yeah, they get blown off course, but they have motors and rudders that can direct them.
[00:09:21] Speaker B: Yeah, 1940s technology.
[00:09:23] Speaker A: Bizarre.
[00:09:24] Speaker B: Also in Ohio news, did you see that a train derailed today in Ohio carrying chemicals in the surrounding areas today, meaning February 6 and surrounding areas had to be evacuated because the fires are still burning as we record this podcast, causing concern for environmental disasters.
[00:09:41] Speaker A: I was at work all day. I didn't see this.
[00:09:43] Speaker B: Well, have you ever seen White Noise on Netflix?
[00:09:46] Speaker A: That's an Adam driver vehicle.
[00:09:49] Speaker B: Yeah, it's about a train that derails in Ohio carrying chemicals in the surrounding areas had to be evacuated over concerns for environmental disaster.
[00:09:58] Speaker A: That's true. It was a cheeky, almost like apocalyptic comedy where there was like a toxic cloud.
It was a strange one. Very highbrow dialogue.
[00:10:10] Speaker B: Yeah. Eerily similar, though, to the situation today in Ohio, which I'm no conspiracy theorist, but is Netflix manufacturing natural disasters in order to get their movies out there a little bit more?
[00:10:22] Speaker A: Is Netflix the new Simpsons?
[00:10:24] Speaker B: That's another question. Talk about illuminati. Are they predicting the future?
[00:10:29] Speaker A: They're predicting the future.
[00:10:30] Speaker B: Who knows?
[00:10:31] Speaker A: We should ask them.
[00:10:32] Speaker B: If you put out enough episodes of a show or movies like Netflix, eventually you're going to predict the future, right?
[00:10:39] Speaker A: True. I guess we'll see. If we all have to be quarantined because of the toxic cloud, we should ask Netflix who they're picking for the Super Bowl.
[00:10:47] Speaker B: We should ask the Simpsons who they're picking.
[00:10:49] Speaker A: Are we allowed to say Super Bowl, by the way?
[00:10:51] Speaker B: Why not?
[00:10:53] Speaker A: I keep hearing that you have to pay for it, but is that only in advertisements?
[00:10:58] Speaker B: I would assume so. If you have any questions, come talk to me. I'm going to say Super Bowl as much as I want.
Anyways, that'll lead right into the Burning River Rundown.
All right. So as we've gotten into the offseason, the Burning River Rundown has become the staple of Cleveland sports news here on the Burning River sports cast in the offseason.
And so we'll start like we always start this segment. We always start with the Browns because.
[00:11:37] Speaker A: We love the Browns because it's technically a Browns podcast.
[00:11:40] Speaker B: It is a Browns podcast.
[00:11:42] Speaker A: But we dabble. We dabble in geopolitical affairs.
[00:11:46] Speaker B: We dabble in guardians. We dabble in Cavaliers in geopolitical affairs.
So, yeah, we'll start with the Browns. Here some stories of note this week for the Browns. Obviously, Miles Garrett, Nick Chubb, Joel Batonio, and Wyatt Teller participated in the Pro Bowl games, the Pro Bowl games, and what seemed to be something. So Browns coming out of this thing. Miles Garrett, one of the faces of our franchise, was seen limping off the field during the Gridiron Gauntlet portion of the games, and it was later confirmed that he had dislocated his toe.
[00:12:18] Speaker A: Can we pause everything real quick and just I got to play what I said literally a week ago.
I do fear that this Gridiron Gauntlet is probably to match your terms from earlier. A one and donener here because this sounds like the most dangerous. This is side by side relay tasks showcasing strength, speed and agility. Six players from each conference compete to.
[00:12:44] Speaker B: See who finishes first.
[00:12:47] Speaker A: We talked about breakaway walls and climbing over walls, under tables, tire run, blocking, sled.
[00:12:55] Speaker B: One guy busting his head open on a table and it's like, all right, that one's done.
[00:12:58] Speaker A: Or just the fact that, I don't know, like a non contact.
Can you tear your CL doing with some of these? Like running through tires in a game that doesn't matter to anyone. So I feel like that's a one and donener.
I love these segments where I literally said this is probably a one and donener because this is the one game where someone's going to get hurt and it just happened to be Miles.
[00:13:21] Speaker B: Yeah. So my note here is great.
Just our franchise player just out there dislocating a toe. So who knows? And that stuff's weird.
It might not be that big of a deal, but if there's any ligament damage or anything like that, you got a messed up toe. And I'm assuming it's probably his big toe.
[00:13:43] Speaker A: It could have been his pinky toe. It could have baby toe.
[00:13:45] Speaker B: Chances are it's probably his big toe and it's probably not.
[00:13:48] Speaker A: You ever notice how girls never have a toenail on their pinky toe? It's like itty bitty so small they just paint the skin because there's no toenail there.
[00:13:56] Speaker B: Don't know where that came from, but.
[00:13:58] Speaker A: Every girl I've ever seen has no toenail.
[00:14:01] Speaker B: Toes are you looking at? You weirdo.
[00:14:03] Speaker A: I like feet.
[00:14:04] Speaker B: He dabbles. He dabbles.
Garrett's hurt. I don't know. Hopefully that doesn't linger.
[00:14:13] Speaker A: Excuse my pneumonia here. Going on the third week of this.
But the whole point of this was to make the game safer because the game was too dangerous. So we wanted to take the danger out and make it safe for these guys to do something.
You didn't do it. Didn't do it.
[00:14:30] Speaker B: Just cancel the Pro Bowl. It's a freaking flag football game at this point. Just get rid of it.
[00:14:34] Speaker A: The unfortunate thing was the Gridiron Gauntlet was actually probably the most entertaining, like, mini game that they did.
[00:14:42] Speaker B: We'll talk more about it up until Miles got hurt. Yeah.
Other Browns news. Here Ben Watson this week.
[00:14:52] Speaker A: Sorry, man. Pneumonia.
[00:14:54] Speaker B: Good God.
[00:14:55] Speaker A: Oh, man.
[00:14:56] Speaker B: I thought I lost my partner there.
[00:14:58] Speaker A: You might still lose me.
[00:15:00] Speaker B: Ben Watson, former tight end for the Browns.
[00:15:02] Speaker A: Benjamin. Benjamin.
[00:15:04] Speaker B: He's actually one of my I really liked him when he was with the.
[00:15:06] Speaker A: Browns, but anyways, he was like Jacobi Brissette if Jacobi Brissette was a tight end.
[00:15:10] Speaker B: Yeah. He was asked this past week about bad interview experiences, and without hesitation, he said the one with the Browns was the worst job interview he has ever had. When asked what happened during it, he said, they asked me if I ever smoked weed. I said no. Then the interviewer grabbed my wrist as if he was feeling my pulse and asked me again, louder. I was seated in a chair in the middle of a dark room with a spotlight on it. Front office stood in the shadows, mob style.
Ben Watson is a Super Bowl champion and Bart Starr Award winner. And this is how the Browns were treating him.
[00:15:46] Speaker A: What's the movie with Mel Gibson where they tape his eyes open? He's in the wheelchair. That's what it sounds like.
[00:15:52] Speaker B: And this was in a tweet so you could throw the tweet up there. Like he said, all of it. It's just wild to me that this but at the same time, it just sounds so Browns. So Browns, what are you doing?
[00:16:03] Speaker A: So far, we're two for two with topics being the Brownsiest. Browns topics of all time.
[00:16:07] Speaker B: I will again say we love the Browns, but Jesus, we always find a way to just Browns things up.
[00:16:14] Speaker A: We just browns it up. The browns is the browns.
[00:16:17] Speaker B: Yeah. So next up, we got Deshaun Watson posted a video online, basically during the Pro Bowl games, right? Like all the Pro Bowl stuff was going on. It was right in the middle of it. It was almost like he was trying to steal some captions there. But his caption on his video that he uploaded was when, you know, 2023 about to be a movie.
The video was him having a drink in a club and nodding along to Rick Astley is never going to give you up.
[00:16:42] Speaker A: Yeah. I almost don't know. Was this just a troll job?
[00:16:46] Speaker B: That's what I said. I said, was he sending a message like, this year is going to be big for the Browns, or was he just trying to Rick roll?
[00:16:52] Speaker A: Everyone very possibly could have been the latter.
Because here's the other thing.
I don't know if Deshaun knows this or not, but like, 2016 was the movie, right? Like down three one in the Finals.
We go into Super Bowl next year with Deshaun and it would be because they had a good season and Deshaun played well.
[00:17:14] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:17:15] Speaker A: When you're down three one to the best team in NBA history, it's really.
[00:17:18] Speaker B: Hard to beat that NBA Finals as.
[00:17:21] Speaker A: Far as go, like, will be the.
[00:17:24] Speaker B: Most ridiculous movie made about the Cavaliers one.
[00:17:27] Speaker A: Yeah. Like, that was the movie. So lack of awareness points there for Deshaun, but we hope he wins the Super Bowl next year.
[00:17:34] Speaker B: But we hope he's right.
And then speaking of browns QBs. I just kind of wanted to that's enough. We're going to have to cut it if I don't stop it.
[00:17:43] Speaker A: I can't breathe, man.
[00:17:44] Speaker B: Sorry. Speaking of Browns QBs, I wanted to throw this in here. What are your thoughts on backup quarterbacks for Deshaun next year?
[00:17:53] Speaker A: Probably going to need one.
[00:17:54] Speaker B: Obviously, Brissette's going to most likely be mean. Hopefully. I doubt we'll be able to, but hopefully we find a way to keep him. That would be pretty awesome.
[00:18:03] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, that would be scenario number one, right, is if you could retain Jacobi Brissette, that would be ideal.
The likelihood of that occurring at this point is probably very slim to none.
[00:18:14] Speaker B: Yeah. And I know we got, like the on the on the roster.
There's guys out there that know backup status. You got? Probably Cooper Rush Gardner, Minshew, Mike White, Nick Mullins. Maybe a few others. What's your thought on who you'd like to see as the backup quarterback?
[00:18:32] Speaker A: So when you think of, like, Nick Mullins and Kellen Mond were a part of your roster or your practice squad this year? So I would think those two names are probably the most likely to end up there because I have a feeling they don't want to invest heavily in this position because there's other holes to fill. That being said, I think this year in the NFL in general, not just from the Browns, standpoint underscored the need for a capable backup quarterback.
[00:18:58] Speaker B: Yeah, we talked about it. It was either last week or the week before about how only twelve quarterbacks in the NFL this year started every game for their team.
[00:19:07] Speaker A: So I would be that being started.
[00:19:08] Speaker B: More than half the game, I would.
[00:19:10] Speaker A: Be beyond thrilled to see them go after a guy like Cooper Rush and even Gardner Minshew. I like Minshew maniac.
[00:19:18] Speaker B: I don't see Gardner Minshew happening just because he tends to bring a lot of publicity to his teams. And I think whoever they get as the backup, they don't want there to be any of these rumblings. And Gardner Minshew. Reminds me a lot, actually, of Baker Mayfield.
[00:19:33] Speaker A: You think? I don't think Gardner brings negative pub.
[00:19:36] Speaker B: He's just fun. No, I just mean in the fact that I think he's the most popular way to say he's a fun Baker Mayfield, but he's always in like the media is always talking to him.
[00:19:48] Speaker A: Yeah, it doesn't seem like he's trying to steal a job or anything. I think he knows he's a backup but definitely has a personality.
[00:19:55] Speaker B: I don't know. I just see them steering clear of any sort of high publicity.
[00:20:00] Speaker A: Well, look, here's the thing. At the end of the day, I just want a backup quarterback that can play in the event goes down.
[00:20:06] Speaker B: That being said, about Minshew, I actually that's my favorite on this short list that we just named.
[00:20:11] Speaker A: I would love to have in fact, in case Deshaun is bad, I would take cooper Rush because maybe he could be a starter. One.
[00:20:21] Speaker B: Just just a couple of thoughts out there. I guess it's kind of a consensus between us. I mean, out of the names that are out there, I'd love to see Gardner Minchew as the backup, but yeah.
[00:20:30] Speaker A: My preference would be Cooper. I think Cooper Rush would be awesome to have, but I just think the likelihood is someone like Kellamond or Cooper.
[00:20:37] Speaker B: Rush, I feel like, might end up being a starter.
[00:20:40] Speaker A: So I think he's in the same boat as Jacoby. He didn't have quite the same sample size in terms of duration, but I think he showed that he can play a little. And guys that can play a little end up sometimes with big. I mean, sometimes all it takes is one game. Matt Flyn threw for five touchdowns and 400 yards one time, and then Seattle gave him $40 million.
[00:21:02] Speaker B: That was the stupidest yeah. Say what you want about the Browns making bad decisions, but at least we're not seattle giving Matt Flyn $40 million. I think we tried to give him a bunch of money. Let's not talk.
[00:21:13] Speaker A: He was like, I ain't coming to Cleveland.
[00:21:14] Speaker B: Yeah. So next up, our boy Joe Woods found a home in New Orleans this week.
[00:21:18] Speaker A: Hurricane Joe Woods has made landfall in New Orleans.
[00:21:22] Speaker B: Yeah. So, I mean, if they like to see blown coverages and an inability to stop the run, then they nailed know.
Yeah, but here's my fear. What if he ends up being really good with New Orleans and we're just like the problem, once again, was Cleveland.
[00:21:37] Speaker A: Well, and so that's the interesting thing about this, right? I think most of us probably didn't expect Joe Woods to get another job.
[00:21:43] Speaker B: So quickly, and they weren't the only ones that wanted to talk to him. I mean, didn't he interview with several different teams?
[00:21:49] Speaker A: Yeah, I think he had a couple interviews, but the fact that they kind of made a direct lateral move to be in a DC again after the very public debacle that this season became for the Browns was a little bit surprising. But I think it, like you said, brings in some very poignant questions.
How are the Saints looking at this?
[00:22:12] Speaker B: Right?
[00:22:12] Speaker A: Are the Saints saying, hey, Joe Woods got a raw deal because personnel wasn't right for his scheme?
[00:22:19] Speaker B: We've said it in Cleveland. We have undersized DTS, undersized linebackers.
[00:22:22] Speaker A: Yeah. So they may be looking at it going, he just didn't have the body.
[00:22:25] Speaker B: Don'T have a secondary pass rush on the other side of Miles Garrett.
[00:22:28] Speaker A: And who knows? Maybe because of those deficiencies, maybe that's why he was calling so many complex schemes to try and plug holes where he didn't have yeah, you try and cover it up, and maybe that's where things got too complicated and he lost the locker room. But it is really interesting because it was much faster than I think most of us thought joe woods would get hired again. I did see a couple of things kind of immediately on the hire, just the news that he was interviewing with them that, hey, Joe Woods can coach because he's got a long resume. But with the Browns, he had two top 15 defenses and a top five defense. So the only thing that I would caution Saints fans is like, yeah, this year we finished, I think, in the top 15. But for the first eight weeks, we were absolute ass the bottom ten in the league. And then as the weather changed and quarterbacks got hurt and a whole number of variables came into play, including our team, kind know, Denzel got healthy after the concussions, and so some things went our way.
[00:23:32] Speaker B: Emerson came along.
[00:23:33] Speaker A: Yeah. So I think those things probably contributed more to that ranking at the end of the year, necessarily, than Joe Woods. But New Orleans had a good defenses there. They were ranked fifth, I think, in the NFL in overall defense. So if they come out and are gangbusters next mean, look, we all know that Joe Woods was the fall guy here. Regardless of what the truth is, we know that Joe Woods was made out to be the fall guy.
[00:24:01] Speaker B: I mean, he was really bad. So I'm okay with it.
[00:24:05] Speaker A: Even if Joe Woods is good this year in New Orleans, I don't even.
[00:24:08] Speaker B: Think bad in Cleveland. It was time for him to go.
[00:24:11] Speaker A: And that's why I think it's a fit question, right. Because I think this just wasn't the right opportunity at the right time for him. I think that everything in Cleveland goes to shit. So he may very well be the top defensive coordinator. Hell, he'll be interviewed for head coaching jobs after this season in New Orleans.
[00:24:27] Speaker B: Because one good year as a coordinator.
[00:24:30] Speaker A: The Saints go to the Super Bowl in the back of their defense, and they go, oh, just Joe Woods is the genius.
[00:24:34] Speaker B: Plus, your Brian Flores, apparently, as a defensive coordinator again, which I thought was kind of OD.
[00:24:39] Speaker A: I found it OD that he went to Minnesota.
Look, we talked about Jim Shorts at length.
[00:24:47] Speaker B: Just love it. Jim Shorts.
[00:24:49] Speaker A: We're both fine with the hire, but I would have had to think that Brian Flores was probably on the top of that candidate.
[00:24:56] Speaker B: He did he prefer Minnesota?
[00:24:59] Speaker A: Yeah. Did he turn the Browns down to go to Minnesota?
[00:25:02] Speaker B: Because it sounded to me pretty quickly like the narrative became the Browns were pulling away from him because they thought he would be a head coach elsewhere. But how much of that is the Browns trying to control the narrative? And no, no, we pulled away instead.
[00:25:15] Speaker A: Of him pulling away, these guys think they're pulling the rug.
[00:25:19] Speaker B: Don't know. I don't.
[00:25:21] Speaker A: Uh, but look, Joe Woods is in New Orleans now, and he's a saint. And Brian Flores is in Minnesota. So we'll see what happens.
[00:25:29] Speaker B: We got the old gym shorts.
[00:25:30] Speaker A: We got gym shorts, gym shorts, gym shorts.
[00:25:33] Speaker B: And then finally, in our Browns topics this week, we've got the hall of Fame Inductees.
They'll be announced Thursday, February 9, at the NFL Honors Ceremony. And Joe Thomas, I think all of our heroes, Joe Thomas is a finalist. And I just wanted to kind of bring up some of these stats for how he stacks up. He went to ten Pro Bowls. He was the fifth player in NFL history to be voted to ten in a row.
He had six first team All Pro selections, I believe eight overall, six first teamers.
He had a .4.
That's the percentage of plays he gave up a sack on. So 30 sacks in 6680 plays, that's an insane number.
[00:26:23] Speaker A: Jed Wills gave up 30 sacks on Tuesday.
[00:26:26] Speaker B: So literally less than half a percentage of the plays he was on the field, he gave up a sack in.
Next up, we got 95.9. That's the career pass block grade from PFF, which is the best of any player in the PFF era, and most importantly, the one we all know. 10,363, the streak, the most consecutive snaps ever played by any player, and it will likely never, ever be broken.
I mean, if that doesn't say First Bow Hall of Famer, I don't know what does.
[00:27:03] Speaker A: Yeah, and I think the other thing that goes along with that is Joe Thomas as a person was very highly regarded across NFL circles.
[00:27:15] Speaker B: Dude missed the draft because he was like, he's the best.
[00:27:19] Speaker A: Nobody's ever said a bad word about Joe Thomas. So whether you're in Cleveland or outside, everybody seems to kind of universally like this guy. So I think that that tells you the kind of high character individual that he is. So I have no reason to believe that he won't be a first ballot hall of Fame guy.
[00:27:38] Speaker B: Well, even beyond his playing career, now, he's an analyst, and everybody loves him as a TV personality. They like all the same things that were said about him in Cleveland are now being said about him everywhere else.
[00:27:53] Speaker A: And I know he's bouncing around a little bit between different networks and doing a couple of different coverages and things, but he's very likely a guy that will end up calling Monday Night Football at some point.
[00:28:03] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, and he was on what was the rock show? The Titan Games or whatever the heck it was. He did that for a minute. That was cool.
[00:28:11] Speaker A: Great. You killed me again. But no. Joe Thomas universally loved champion ru McClanan.
As far as left tackles go, well.
[00:28:26] Speaker B: Keele wasn't a winner. That's the one thing he wasn't.
[00:28:29] Speaker A: He accomplished everything you can accomplish as a left tackle except for winning, because he played for Cleveland. But that's not to say he wasn't exceptional at what he did. And 30 sacks. 30 sacks.
[00:28:43] Speaker B: If nothing, it's even more impressive, because imagine if he actually had some. Help on those lines. There was a few times that we had good offensive lines with him. But overall, imagine him being on a really good team. He probably would have given up less sacks than he did.
[00:28:59] Speaker A: Yeah. With competent quarterback.
[00:29:01] Speaker B: Didn't hold the ball for ten years.
[00:29:03] Speaker A: Alex Mack and a couple of guys that ran through with him, but not a cohesive unit. Certainly not anything close to like, what they have now from a talent perspective.
[00:29:11] Speaker B: No. Now the quarterback plays so much higher, too.
[00:29:14] Speaker A: And I think the really important thing is, too, is when you compare his numbers overall, the whole resume, you just went through to other hall of Fame left tackles, like they're right there. Maybe he has a few less games than some of those guys. There surprisingly a lot of guys that had Joe Thomas played a long time, which is 180 games or so that were more than he had played.
[00:29:36] Speaker B: I was real surprised.
[00:29:37] Speaker A: But still, it's ten years of absolute excellence.
[00:29:40] Speaker B: So the final question, will he be a first ballot hall of Famer in your eyes?
[00:29:43] Speaker A: If he isn't, there's something wrong.
[00:29:45] Speaker B: I would totally agree with that. The only reason I asked the question is because that's what they're doing right now.
[00:29:50] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:29:51] Speaker B: They're having discussions and they're talking about it. If he isn't announced on Thursday as first ballot hall of Famer, I'm going to be shocked.
[00:30:00] Speaker A: We might have to do a breaking news running over sports cast.
[00:30:04] Speaker B: Yeah. All the hall of Fame voters are idiots.
[00:30:06] Speaker A: Idiots like cincinnati. F them all.
[00:30:09] Speaker B: Only if Joe Thomas doesn't get in.
[00:30:11] Speaker A: Yeah, only if they can get not F'd. Yeah, if he stays. If he so.
[00:30:18] Speaker B: So that's it for the Browns for this week. We're going to get into more topics in the following weeks. We're going to start talking about free agency. We're going to start talking about the draft coming up. We got a lot to talk about with the Browns, but we kind of want to make it through the Super Bowl and everything.
[00:30:33] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:30:33] Speaker B: Football out of the way.
[00:30:34] Speaker A: I think there will always be some Browns news, but I think we'll likely get into more like discussion topics as the offseason goes because we like talking to you and there's no football to watch.
[00:30:47] Speaker B: True. So next up we got the Cavaliers. They are now 33 and 22, 5th in the east, still still second in the Central, except now they're a few more games back, four games back. They continue to struggle on the road. We've been saying it basically the entire season. They're 22 and six at home, which I think is still the best record in the NBA, or at least tied with the best record and eleven and 16 on the road, which is not good.
But the good news is Donovan Donovan, donovan Mitchell is back from his groin strain. And boy, there were some fireworks in the game against the first. I think that was his first full game back.
Came back from a groin strain, mind you, and Dylan Brooks went down on a play right next to him and tried to give him the old, I'm flailing my arms, and I happened to punch you in the.
[00:31:40] Speaker A: I mean, he very deliberately punched him in the dick. Yeah.
[00:31:44] Speaker B: And Donovan Mitchell was not having it. Just instantly went right at him, basically got up in his face, started throwing some pretty hard shoves and maybe some pseudo fists there.
[00:31:58] Speaker A: Throwing some pretty hard shoves.
[00:32:00] Speaker B: Yeah, it got interesting pretty quick. They both ended up getting ejected. There were no suspensions that I saw.
Did Brooks get suspension? I didn't see any suspension.
[00:32:08] Speaker A: I didn't see anything.
[00:32:10] Speaker B: But after the game, Mitchell made it clear that Brooks has a reputation of these antics kind of around the league and is known as a dirty player. But I think the biggest thing that came out of this and what I wanted to talk about this the most for is I think this may be looked at as like a turning point in the season for the Cavs, because up to this point, getting punched in the dick yeah. Donovan Mitchell getting punched in the dick was the turning point for the Cavs. You heard it here first. I'm burning river sportscast.
So up to this point in the season, everyone's kind of talked about the Cavs are kind of soft. They don't really have a good identity.
There's just a lot of questions about their toughness.
[00:32:51] Speaker A: The Cavs kind of need somebody to punch someone in the dick.
[00:32:55] Speaker B: Well, that was what I was getting at, was that basically after this happened to Donovan Mitchell, like, the whole team came out was, no, no, this is not happening. And then after the game, JB. Bickerstaff came out, and his quote was, we don't have guys who start shit, but we also don't have guys that run from shit.
And it kind of just seemed to galvanize the whole team, and they've all kind of come together. It seems like it's made everybody closer. So, I mean, a lot of season left to be played.
[00:33:24] Speaker A: What a loving story. Get punched in the dick, and now we're all closer.
It's like a nursery rhyme. That's a sean.
[00:33:34] Speaker B: Remember that time that Donovan Mitchell got punched in the dick halfway through the season, and the Cavaliers went on to win the NBA championship?
[00:33:42] Speaker A: Look, I get where you're going with that, and certainly I hope that that is a lightning rod for them.
But I almost just feel like still, they don't have that guy that is the enforcer on their team.
He's just not on the roster, because they're all pretty good character guys.
[00:33:59] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, that is true.
They pride themselves on not talking trash, not doing any of that stuff. Maybe. It could be Kevin love, though. Kevin Love got pulled from the rotation. I don't know if you saw that this week it's finally happened. He's older. He's not really helping the team a ton. Part of the season, he got pulled from the official rotations.
[00:34:18] Speaker A: There's a lot of conjecture this time of year anyway, because it's trade deadline time. So it's like, anytime these guys gets pulled, it's like, are we trading Kevin Love? Are we trading carousel? Vert.
[00:34:26] Speaker B: Kevin Love has survived more trade discussions.
Anybody in M, he should be given.
[00:34:32] Speaker A: An award for that.
[00:34:33] Speaker B: Yeah, no, but make him the enforcer. If you're going to pull him from the official rotation, just throw him in there every once in a while. Like, that guy punched Donovan Mitchell in the dick. Go take him out.
[00:34:42] Speaker A: Kevin Love got his arm pulled out of its socket by Kelly O'lineick. By a guy named Kelly.
[00:34:47] Speaker B: That was the dirtiest play.
[00:34:48] Speaker A: That was a dirty play. But I don't think Kevin loves that guy either.
[00:34:51] Speaker B: That cost us a championship.
[00:34:52] Speaker A: Kevin Love's too good looking for that.
[00:34:55] Speaker B: That cost us a champion. I know warriors fans like, oh, we won this many in this many years. Literally the first one. We didn't have Kyrie Irving or Kevin Love. It was just LeBron versus the whole team, and he still outplayed you guys, and somehow he averaged a triple double and should have been the MVP.
[00:35:10] Speaker A: But do you think we could make a move for Dylan Brooks?
[00:35:14] Speaker B: He's the guy.
[00:35:14] Speaker A: He's the guy.
[00:35:15] Speaker B: I know we just talked about him punching everyone in the dick, but let's bring him in so he can punch other teams in the dick. There's so many times that I said punch in the dick.
[00:35:25] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, getting punching the dick is never good here's. What I would say is probably maybe even more galvanizing is, I think, the opportunity that's in front of them now, and I'm sure that this is in our notes here somewhere, about Kyrie now being moved to such good news. Dallas, I think, that is almost more galvanizing in that forest. Looks really open now. Brooklyn is, by all accounts, probably going to mail this thing.
[00:36:01] Speaker B: They got they're going to lean on Kevin Durant. And I think people are going to probably give me shit for saying this, but I think Kevin Durant has proved his entire career that he can't be the only guy.
[00:36:11] Speaker A: Look, Kevin Durant is really do they.
[00:36:14] Speaker B: Still have James Harden? I don't even know if James Harden's still there. That's how good he is.
[00:36:16] Speaker A: How many games does Kevin Durant play each season for the Brooklyn Nets?
[00:36:19] Speaker B: Seven.
[00:36:20] Speaker A: Exactly. So he can have seven really good games, and then what are they going to do?
So I think that all of a sudden, the dynamic of the east has changed because of Kyrie moving to Dallas. And all of a sudden, it's like, hey, it's right in front of us, guys. We got punched in the dick, and now we got this huge opportunity.
[00:36:41] Speaker B: Speaking of Kyrie moving to dallas. What a missed opportunity for the Lakers out there. LeBron is probably so sad.
[00:36:48] Speaker A: What do you think is in LeBron's mind right now? He hates, like, because he did come out this weekend. What did he say?
[00:36:54] Speaker B: He said he said, sometimes it feels like I'm all alone, or like it was some random quote like that. He said, I'm by myself out here or something.
[00:37:01] Speaker A: Am I the problem? Or something.
[00:37:02] Speaker B: He wrote, like, is it me? Or something like that. It was something vague. And LeBron like, that was the first.
[00:37:07] Speaker A: Time that I've heard LeBron really kind of lament his situation. Up until this point, it's kind of been like, hey, LeBron's out in La doing his thing. He's making movies and stuff.
[00:37:17] Speaker B: He does his normal thing where he kind of puts the front office on notice. He's like, you guys need to make a trade or I'm going to be upset. But he hasn't been like, we can't get the job done with our team very often. I think maybe one time last year he kind of said that when there was injuries.
[00:37:33] Speaker A: Well, I just think no one is under the impression that La. Is going to win an NBA championship now or next.
[00:37:42] Speaker B: Can't stay on the court. Russell Westbrook is Russell Westbrook. I mean, he's like a shell of what he was when he was with Oklahoma City.
[00:37:52] Speaker A: But if you're like, what are you doing besides padding stats until your son arrives?
This is a guy that his entire life has wanted to be great, wanted to win championships, and now you're just stuck in absolute basketball purgatory.
[00:38:07] Speaker B: Yeah, we actually talked about LeBron a lot more than I wanted to here. But we'll get back to LeBron in a second, okay? In that same game where Donovan Mitchell was punched in the dick, chetty Osmond officially passed Jr. Smith on the Cavs all time three pointers made list.
He is now in fifth place. The only ones ahead of Chetty Osmond are Kyrie Irving at four, Mark Price, and there's a pretty big gap, so he's not catching them for a while. But Kyrie Irving at four, Mark Price at three, Kevin Love at two, and LeBron James at one. So that's pretty good company for Chetty Osmond.
[00:38:41] Speaker A: You know why I like watching Chetty? Because he moves a lot. Like Della Vidova, just far more.
Like, I don't even think he looks athletic, though. When he moves, he looks like Fumbly and stumbly. But, you know, he's athletic because he's in the NBA and he's good. So he makes athletic moves. But man, just the way his body.
[00:39:02] Speaker B: Looks, well, he's nailing he bleeds yellow.
[00:39:04] Speaker A: He bleeds yellow.
[00:39:07] Speaker B: That was going to be my segue into LeBron, but we've already talked about LeBron a lot, so I'll just say. Speaking of LeBron. Speaking of LeBron, we've been following LeBron's journey to becoming the top scorer in league history as of this moment. We're recording this on February 6. He has 36 points from passing Kareem.
[00:39:26] Speaker A: Yeah. By the time you hear this podcast, LeBron will be the all time scorer in the NBA.
[00:39:31] Speaker B: And if not, he'll be doing it the night this one comes out.
[00:39:33] Speaker A: True.
[00:39:35] Speaker B: His last five games, 2726-2841 and 20.
So, yeah, like Kenny said, he's going to pass him before the next show. It's just been incredible what he's been able to do and continues to do night in and night out in his 20th season with a shit team.
[00:39:49] Speaker A: I had no idea Kareem Hunt was so good at basketball.
[00:39:54] Speaker B: I hate you. This is the worst joke ever.
And then finally, just to touch a little bit on the Guardians right now.
[00:40:03] Speaker A: On the guardians.
[00:40:04] Speaker B: You love it when I say touch on anything.
Talk about the Guardians here for a second. Spring training. As we mentioned last week, it opens February 17 for pitchers and catchers. Everyone else reports for the full squad workouts on February 21. And the first spring game is against the Reds on February 25. So it's almost time for Guardians baseball.
[00:40:27] Speaker A: Sure is. Sure is. Yeah.
[00:40:29] Speaker B: I'm looking excited about that because we talked about it when we were talking about the Progressive Field renovations coming.
I like going to the Guardians games and just hanging out and having a.
[00:40:39] Speaker A: Couple of beers and it's a marker of the season, too.
[00:40:44] Speaker B: The weather is all turning. I don't have to deal with this crap snow in Northeast Ohio anymore.
[00:40:48] Speaker A: We had Puxatani Phil this week and Buckeye Chuck and these guys, and we're starting to round the corner into we're not there yet, but we're rounding the quarter into spring.
[00:40:58] Speaker B: One of these days coming up, it's going to be 60. I'm excited about that.
[00:41:00] Speaker A: Yeah. So it's just a sign of things to come.
[00:41:03] Speaker B: I'm not a fan of winter in general. Seasonal depression is real and I just feel sad all winter long.
[00:41:11] Speaker A: Yeah, depression is real for sure.
Yeah. All of January.
[00:41:17] Speaker B: They also need to stop making my days shorter. You sons of bitches.
[00:41:20] Speaker A: That's going to end, though, right?
[00:41:22] Speaker B: Yeah, it is. They passed legislation for that.
[00:41:25] Speaker A: Geopolitical affairs.
[00:41:26] Speaker B: Yeah. When does that start?
[00:41:27] Speaker A: I think it's this year, isn't it?
[00:41:29] Speaker B: Is it this year?
[00:41:29] Speaker A: I think it is.
[00:41:30] Speaker B: Oh, my gosh.
[00:41:31] Speaker A: I think this is the last spring forward of all time.
[00:41:33] Speaker B: You just made me so excited. Like, I've never been more excited.
[00:41:36] Speaker A: You're not hashtag blasted.
[00:41:38] Speaker B: I know. I'm so hard right now.
You finally got me to say it on the show.
Yeah. I'm so excited that I never have to deal with seasonal depression again. Not that I have it, like, severely or anything.
It just gets me so down when all of a sudden it's dark at, like, 04:00. Yeah, it's the worst. It's literally the worst feeling, knowing when I get off work and I get off work at a normal time. When I get off work, it's dark and there's nothing to do.
[00:42:07] Speaker A: It is pitch black when I drive to work in the morning. It is pitch black when I drive home at night.
[00:42:12] Speaker B: Dumbest. So I'm excited. You just made my day. Thank you.
[00:42:16] Speaker A: Glad I could be here for you. Red hot Ronnie jams.
[00:42:20] Speaker B: Next up here, don't forget to call the Burning River sports guys.
Listen, call us. Talk about the Cavs guardians. Definitely. Talk about the browns. Talk about Stefanik. Talk about Joe Woods being gone. What he's going to do next? Our dirty old gym shorts.
[00:42:36] Speaker A: Jim shorts.
[00:42:37] Speaker B: You know, talk about the Haslams. I don't care. Talk about anything.
[00:42:40] Speaker A: Tell me I'm fat.
[00:42:40] Speaker B: Sing me a song. Whatever.
[00:42:42] Speaker A: Sing me a song.
[00:42:43] Speaker B: Yeah. I don't care. 3302-2780-8033-0227-8080-3302-278, call us now. Operator line not standing by. Leave a message and we will play it on air.
[00:42:58] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:42:59] Speaker B: Which leads us into Troll Patrol.
[00:43:01] Speaker A: Patrol. You're a funny guy.
Funny how? He's a big boy. He knows what he said. What'd you say? I'm funny how? I mean, funny like I'm a clown. I abuse you. What do you mean, funny? Funny how? How am I funny?
[00:43:12] Speaker B: All right, so this segment was new last week. We're continuing it with it this week. This is some of the best comments on our socials from the prior week or weeks.
[00:43:21] Speaker A: Just whenever you leave them.
[00:43:22] Speaker B: Yeah. So listen, we have a video out there right now about the city of Cincinnati where Kenny just he apparently had had it with Cincinnati in that episode, and he went in on them and just shit all over that town.
[00:43:35] Speaker A: I didn't even think I was like that derogatory.
[00:43:39] Speaker B: When you watch the video back, you weren't that derogatory. You went hard.
[00:43:43] Speaker A: Look, I just don't like Cincinnati. I will triple down. I will triple dog down it.
Cincinnati is not a fun place to go.
[00:43:52] Speaker B: Yeah, but they're all clapping back here specifically on TikTok. And I'm just going to say that all of the comments this week are from that video on TikTok, because there was a lot more good ones.
First one from Kay Lynch, 599 on TikTok. He said to us, hey, at least you guys aren't Detroit. Which, in case anyone doesn't know, that's an old Mike Polk video that was out there. He said, at least we're not Detroit.
[00:44:17] Speaker A: We're not Detroit.
[00:44:18] Speaker B: So that was a good one. I like that. Rick lewis. 1921. That's an old guy on TikTok said, your mom was more fun.
[00:44:28] Speaker A: My mom nice. My mom was more fun.
[00:44:30] Speaker B: Nice. Tina and Cindy will be pissed to hear that.
[00:44:32] Speaker A: We don't call her Tuna for nothing.
[00:44:35] Speaker B: Classic mom joke. Good job, buddy. And then next up, James J. Jones. Zero on TikTok told us you know nothing. Apparently, we're Jon Snow a good Game of Thrones reference. Good job, buddy. And then finally, Jen so vicious told us, y'all just don't know shit.
Tell me you're from Kentucky without telling me you're from Kentucky.
[00:45:01] Speaker A: Hey, look, here's the thing. I don't even give a shit about Kentucky.
[00:45:04] Speaker B: Well, the funny thing is, I actually love Kentucky because I'm a huge Bourbon fan, and I go on I did the entire Bourbon trail in, like, four days, and it was fantastic.
[00:45:14] Speaker A: And I love the like, in Kentucky is like the beginning of the south. Like, I love the food, barbecue, like, all this whiskey.
[00:45:20] Speaker B: It's just so funny because I actually said in this video, I said, Let it be known that I am not shitting on Cincinnati. And you said, no, I am. And you went in on them. And everybody in all these comments still is mad at me because my throwaway line at the end of the video where you said, they are less than Ohioans and just off the cuff, I said, yeah, they're Kentuckyans.
[00:45:43] Speaker A: I didn't mean that.
[00:45:44] Speaker B: But everybody's so mad about it.
[00:45:47] Speaker A: I don't have anything against Kentucky. All I said was, Cincinnati should be a part of Kentucky.
[00:45:51] Speaker B: No, but all these comments are great.
[00:45:53] Speaker A: We love it.
[00:45:53] Speaker B: We love seeing them. I would just say, you guys are so soft, man. You guys are just making Kentucky and Cincinnati look bad, which Cincinnati is basically Kentucky like we've talked about.
[00:46:03] Speaker A: Here's my problem. We got some real fire vids out there.
[00:46:06] Speaker B: That's the one that you guys this.
[00:46:07] Speaker A: Is the one that they're watching.
Those wasn't even a good one. We got some really good vids out there.
[00:46:14] Speaker B: Like, of all your takes, that was probably your most, like, mediocre.
[00:46:17] Speaker A: I mean, we've wrapped all the facts and all the fun stuff that we talk about and the stuff that's actually entertaining. And the one thing that stuck is the fact that these people were so.
[00:46:26] Speaker B: Mean to our tech.
[00:46:27] Speaker A: I don't like to visit Cincinnati.
[00:46:29] Speaker B: We had another one. I didn't put it on here because it just wasn't that good, because it was kind of just annoying. But the girl said, this is so offensive on so many levels.
Are you taking this video seriously? Do we sound like we're serious? Like, he's literally saying, oh, this is not even an airport.
[00:46:46] Speaker A: Close.
[00:46:46] Speaker B: But that was as big as this. Come on.
[00:46:49] Speaker A: You're letting a Browns podcast live rent free in your head.
[00:46:52] Speaker B: Yeah. We appreciate it, though. Thanks for the views. Thanks for the comments. Thanks for the engagement. It really helps us out.
[00:46:58] Speaker A: More importantly, Cincinnati is a dump. And Skyline Chili will give you diarrhea. Every time.
[00:47:02] Speaker B: Every time.
[00:47:03] Speaker A: Every time.
[00:47:04] Speaker B: I'll still eat it, though.
[00:47:05] Speaker A: Every time.
[00:47:06] Speaker B: Every time. It's time.
All right, so that's it for News from the Land this week. Let's take a quick revenue break, and we'll come back and we'll talk about.
[00:47:15] Speaker A: The Pro Bowl and the Super Bowl excellent.
[00:47:20] Speaker B: Topath Distillery. Topath Distillery, the newest craft distillery in northeast Ohio, located in Nakron and family owned, Topath Distillery focuses on high quality spirits. Carefully made in small batches, topaz lineup includes an ultra smooth, award winning premium vodka a small batch silver rum made from the highest grade molasses, an American craft gin made with nine botanicals, and a blended straight bourbon made from corn and rye. Topath Distillery. Visit Topath distillery.com to find an agency near you where the spirits are available. And make sure to ask your local bartender and restauranteur. Topath Distillery handcrafted, small batch, local and family owned.
[00:47:59] Speaker A: Topath.
[00:48:00] Speaker B: I love topath.
[00:48:01] Speaker A: I think I probably should do like you do with a baby, where you put, like, the whiskey on their teeth. Maybe I just need some of that to make me feel better, to kick this cold, just look like a crackhead.
[00:48:12] Speaker B: That's what I was going for.
All right, that leads into the Pro Bowl games.
[00:48:19] Speaker A: Recap.
[00:48:39] Speaker B: We'll kind of recap everything. We'll try and keep this brief.
Start with precision passing. Tyler Huntley competed in this. Why the hell was Tyler Huntley?
[00:48:48] Speaker A: I still can't figure this one out. He averaged, like, 68 yards a game.
[00:48:52] Speaker B: He had two touchdowns on the entire year.
[00:48:57] Speaker A: How was he even eligible?
[00:48:59] Speaker B: How did Jacoby Brusette not go over him?
[00:49:01] Speaker A: Right?
[00:49:01] Speaker B: I don't know. I don't care. I'm not spending a lot of time on Tyler Huntley. No way. He should have been.
[00:49:09] Speaker A: Tyler Huntley.
[00:49:09] Speaker B: He actually had a really good performance in this.
[00:49:12] Speaker A: Yeah, he showcased himself well, and him.
[00:49:14] Speaker B: And Derek Carr led the AFC to a win. Like I said, both big performances. The best part about this whole event was when it was over.
And Derek Carr, I should just leave it at that, but no. When Derek Carr was being interviewed and they asked him, they said, have you ever been that hot in Las Vegas? And his reply, no, not that hot. That's probably why I'm going somewhere else.
So just one final parting shot at Vegas.
And speaking of which, the Raiders put his jersey in the clearance section of the team shop this week, so that's probably good. Feels bad.
[00:49:48] Speaker A: Look, Derek Carr, he was a good quarterback.
[00:49:53] Speaker B: He's probably one of the most underrated quarterbacks because he's been on some really bad he's like, if the Browns had a good quarterback through all their bad.
[00:50:02] Speaker A: And that's what I was just going to say is that every year, everybody's always like, well, if we just had like, a Derek Carr. Like, he's the guy you compare your like if we just had a careful.
[00:50:11] Speaker B: What you wish for. Because they had a Derek Carr and the rest of their team was so.
[00:50:14] Speaker A: I mean, his numbers aren't bad. No, I mean, his numbers are pretty strong, comparatively.
But apparently he's just ass now. He got punched in the dick, and he was over for him. See ya.
[00:50:26] Speaker B: Next up was the lightning round. The AFC won this one. Trey Hendrickson caught five punts without dropping any footballs from the jugs machine.
[00:50:34] Speaker A: That was kind of the the way they were trying to catch these was just yeah, like, some of them, because Batonio got out.
He had tried to catch the football with one hand and hold, like, three footballs close to his body.
But then Trey Henderson just caught the football with the footballs just together like it was mitts.
[00:50:58] Speaker B: It was just that's usually your big head.
And then he also dumped the bucket on Eli when he hit the target with his throw to kind of seal the deal. And why was there confetti in that bucket? Why was that thing let's dump confetti on him. That was the most anticlimactic confetti. Yeah, it definitely should have been, like slime. Like Nickelodeon. They need to take this segment over of the Pro Bowl games. Pro bowl games and put slime all over the place.
[00:51:31] Speaker A: It should have at least been Poop.
[00:51:33] Speaker B: Okay, well, next up, we had the longest drive. Jordan Poyer won this one for the AFC.
[00:51:39] Speaker A: Can I just say that this segment was exactly what I thought it was going to be. A bunch of guys that couldn't hit a golf ball. Why didn't they?
[00:51:46] Speaker B: They did what I said, though. They said, you don't have to land it anywhere. We'll just track it wherever it goes.
[00:51:50] Speaker A: No, it had to go in. The grid was matt.
[00:51:54] Speaker B: It was a big grid.
[00:51:55] Speaker A: And half of them didn't hit it most of the time.
I don't understand why they were having a golf event, why they didn't pre screen guys and said, you know, the.
[00:52:04] Speaker B: Guys like, any good at golf?
[00:52:05] Speaker A: You know, guys like Aaron Rodgers are good at golf. Why was Aaron Rodgers not there? They brought in at least two guys when they did their introduction, said, I never played golf before, and I watched a YouTube video in the plane over on how to drive the golf ball, and they didn't even hit the ball. Like, the one guy took three swings and missed all three of them.
[00:52:23] Speaker B: That's embarrassing.
[00:52:25] Speaker A: What is the point of this?
[00:52:26] Speaker B: But, yeah, Jordan Poyer won it. So that's kind of cool. 320 yards.
[00:52:29] Speaker A: There were only two drives in play.
[00:52:32] Speaker B: One was like 305 or whatever. The first 307 was 320. So good job.
Epic dodgeball next.
[00:52:41] Speaker A: I'm more for bringing Jordan Poyer in, though, now that I've seen him drive a golf ball. He was real silky smooth.
[00:52:47] Speaker B: Fine.
[00:52:49] Speaker A: Great.
I think I just sat on my nut.
[00:52:56] Speaker B: That's going to make it in the show.
[00:53:00] Speaker A: Sorry, old guy problems.
My bad.
[00:53:04] Speaker B: You're paying load.
Next up was Epic Dodgeball, and the NFC won this one. And the best part about this entire thing was when Saquon took a devastating headshot in the semifinals, which, dumbest rule ever. The other guy was out because it hit him in the face. Yeah, so stupid.
[00:53:23] Speaker A: Should have at least been like a redo.
[00:53:24] Speaker B: This is real dodgeball. You get hit in the face, you're just out.
[00:53:27] Speaker A: Yeah, like it's the old White Goodman.
[00:53:30] Speaker B: From the movie Dodgeball.
[00:53:31] Speaker A: Joni loves not you're probably not getting CTE from getting hit with a dodgeball.
[00:53:37] Speaker B: Once and if you are, you shouldn't have played dodgeball.
Dodge a wrench. And next up, best catch. This was the dumbest thing I've ever seen in my entire life. And the only thing that this did was cause controversy because Stefan Diggs was just right up behind the cheerleader's booties.
[00:54:00] Speaker A: Yeah. What was he doing back there? Just making headlines?
[00:54:02] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, he thought he was slick. Just he's like, it's part of the trick, I swear.
[00:54:06] Speaker A: Can't even do that anymore. You can't do it.
[00:54:08] Speaker B: Just crazy. So dumbest thing I've ever seen. They literally ran, jumped off a trampoline and tried to do tricks while catching a football or two, in some cases. So stupid.
[00:54:19] Speaker A: Heterosexual nonsense is the fastest way to get fired today's. World. Or canceled.
[00:54:23] Speaker B: Yeah, but it was terrible. Absolutely terrible segment. But for what it's worth, amon RA St Brown won it for the job. Good job, buddy.
[00:54:34] Speaker A: Fine.
[00:54:36] Speaker B: Next up was the Gridiron Gauntlet. You mentioned it earlier. This actually was probably the most entertaining of all of the Pro Bowl games. Pro bowl games? You guys say that every time we get a chance.
[00:54:46] Speaker A: It reminded me a little bit of American Gladiators.
I almost think the Pro Bowl games should just be American Gladiators. They just shoot each other with tennis balls and whatnot. Climbing over.
[00:54:58] Speaker B: So it was cool. We did get to see Nick Chubb, Joel Petonio, Miles Garrett on the same team.
Right. So that was neat.
[00:55:06] Speaker A: But they're always on the same team.
[00:55:08] Speaker B: But I mean, that was neat to see them on a Pro Bowl, like in one of these events, like, all doing at the same like everybody from one team was on the same. Sure.
[00:55:16] Speaker A: Up until Miles's toe fell off.
[00:55:18] Speaker B: Well, that happened. And then in true Brown's fashion, we lost. So the NFC won this one. And like you said, Miles Garrett's toe fell off. So, yeah, basically everything bad that could have happened did happen.
[00:55:30] Speaker A: Murphy's Law.
[00:55:31] Speaker B: Yep. Next up was move the Chains. Literally have no notes in this other than the AFC one. Easily.
Yeah, it wasn't very exciting.
[00:55:41] Speaker A: No.
[00:55:42] Speaker B: Next up was Kick TAC Toe, which we thought was going to be pretty interesting. It was actually really dumb because kickers are way less accurate than you think they are, especially punters. Like, how are you going to have a punter punt at a freaking board that's in a goalpost? Like, the punt comes almost straight down by the time it's coming down. What do you mean? I just don't get it.
[00:56:05] Speaker A: Well, yeah, even going back to the old Madden games, they didn't have a punter kick through a goalpost. They just had them, like, coffin corner it. Yeah, that's what a punter does.
[00:56:14] Speaker B: The AFC won this. Their team was Justin Tucker, AJ Cole and Morgan Cox. And in case anyone didn't watch this, morgan Cox literally won it by himself. The long snapper was the one that hit every target. Justin. Tucker, the best kicker in NFL history, didn't hit a single target, and neither did AJ. Cole, because a punter can't punt a ball into a grid in a goalpost.
[00:56:35] Speaker A: Look, here's the thing. Justin Tucker is still reeling from missing two kicks against the Browns.
[00:56:41] Speaker B: Feels bad, man.
[00:56:42] Speaker A: He'll never be the same.
[00:56:44] Speaker B: That was it for him. End of a career. Incredible.
Which finally takes us to flag football.
Game one. The NFC won. Game two. The AFC won.
Neither of them was that exciting, which took us to the final flag football game that decided it all. And going into the game, all these events counted for points. Three points for every win. Whatever it was. AFC hit was leading 21 to 15 to start the game, while the NFC won 35 to 33. And again, not very exciting. One highlight of the flag football games, though, was Stefan Diggs did throw an interception to his brother, Trayvon Diggs, which was pretty funny because they were just on each other the entire game.
[00:57:31] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:57:31] Speaker B: And they tried some stupid lateral, some ridiculous thing, and Trayvon Diggs was not having it. He was like, yeah, I'm going to take this to the house.
[00:57:40] Speaker A: Basically, he almost returned it.
[00:57:42] Speaker B: I think he got to like the two yard line or something, which it wasn't a real football field, so he went like 30 yards fair.
[00:57:50] Speaker A: I will say, I thought this game had good physicality. Like these guys kind of forgot it was flag football at times. Yeah, there was shoving each other.
[00:57:59] Speaker B: Devante Adams, I think, got decleted.
[00:58:01] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:58:02] Speaker B: Like in the corner of the end zone.
[00:58:03] Speaker A: It was a little more physical than I thought, which I liked.
[00:58:07] Speaker B: He actually tweeted about it. He said, we're out here playing flag.
[00:58:09] Speaker A: Football and I'm getting but ultimately, like, this whole thing was kind of a wet blanket. I mean, look, we understand it had to be something. You got to do something with these guys.
[00:58:19] Speaker B: They literally did what I said they were going to do, though. They rolled out the red carpet for this thing, acted like it was the biggest event since sliced bread. Like, literally, they thought this was the greatest thing. This was the greatest show on earth. The old barnum and Bailey. Like, it was the greatest show.
[00:58:35] Speaker A: Don't even get me started on a circus. Don't even do it.
[00:58:39] Speaker B: And it just was not like, it was not exciting. There maybe were two times the entire.
[00:58:45] Speaker A: Pro Bowl game about to get gassed up, that there's no more circus.
[00:58:49] Speaker B: That I was like, wow, this was interesting. But what we have learned, eli Manning is the superior Manning coach, and nobody can deny that.
[00:59:01] Speaker A: Is that right?
[00:59:02] Speaker B: Yeah, he won.
[00:59:03] Speaker A: Okay?
I just know one of the last games that I was watching was when Jared Goff threw the ball to nobody and I guess the second game at the end of it, and Eli was trying to call play and Jared goff just overruled him in the huddle. And he was like, no, let's do I was, well, well, if they blitz, just run the other way.
But he's a superior Manning coach.
[00:59:29] Speaker B: Superior Manning coach Kid tonight.
[00:59:32] Speaker A: He's always been elite.
[00:59:34] Speaker B: That's true. Fair.
[00:59:35] Speaker A: You can't spell elite without Eli.
[00:59:37] Speaker B: That's absolutely true. Put it up there.
[00:59:40] Speaker A: Elite.
[00:59:42] Speaker B: There it is. Eli.
[00:59:43] Speaker A: Eli.
[00:59:45] Speaker B: All right, so let's get into the Super Bowl preview.
Anyway, so we got for the Super Bowl here, patrick Mahomes seems to be actually healthy. Now, he's been a full participant in pretty much every practice, which is surprising. He came back from the dreaded high ankle sprain in record time. So whatever drugs are giving him there in Kansas City got to be good.
But some fun facts from this I mean, I don't have a lot of analysis just because I just want to enjoy the Super Bowl. I'm going to be honest with you. I didn't go in depth here. I've just got a lot of fun facts to share for the most part because I just want to enjoy it. I just want to hang out and watch the Super Bowl just like any other Browns fan who has really no horse in this game, in this race. It's just like, yeah, they're yeah, I.
[01:00:46] Speaker A: Mean, my horse is Philadelphia because I picked him to win the Super Bowl at the beginning of the playoffs.
[01:00:51] Speaker B: But here's some things that'll turn you down. Then shut your mouth. Andy Reid has never lost against the Eagles, and the Chiefs have covered the spread every single time.
[01:01:01] Speaker A: Well, Andy Reid used to be an Eagles.
[01:01:05] Speaker B: Okay?
Also, the Eagles have been talking about how good they are all season long, them and their fans, but they seem to have forgotten that in order to get to the Super Bowl, they beat Daniel Jones, good old Danny Dimes and Josh Johnson.
[01:01:22] Speaker A: Danny Dimes.
[01:01:23] Speaker B: So those were the quarterbacks they beat to get to the Super Bowl. And now they're facing Mahomes.
[01:01:28] Speaker A: But Jalen hurts. Is the NFL's MVP?
[01:01:32] Speaker B: We'll see on Thursday.
[01:01:34] Speaker A: We will see. And it will be jalen hurts.
[01:01:36] Speaker B: It probably will, but I mean no, in all seriousness, though, this is probably, on paper, the most evenly matched Super Bowl that I can remember.
And if you don't believe me, both teams have a 16 and three overall record this year. Both teams have scored 546 points.
Both teams have six all Pro players, including a Kelsey brother and their quarterback.
[01:02:01] Speaker A: Each team has a Kelsey brother, and.
[01:02:03] Speaker B: They were both the number one seed in their conference. So, I mean, it literally is two best teams. Yeah, it's what you want to see, and I think it's going to be an exciting game.
You got any cool facts to add in here?
[01:02:19] Speaker A: My facts are for the end of the show, but no, I'm very much looking forward to the game. You got to give us at least.
[01:02:25] Speaker B: A little bit of analysis.
[01:02:27] Speaker A: Yeah, my analysis is this, is that I think Jalen Hurts wins MVP this week. I think he's the best player on the field. I think Patrick Mahomes is the best quarterback in the game today, like bar none.
But Jalen Hurts does things that Patrick Mahomes can't do, especially with the high ankle sprain.
[01:02:48] Speaker B: As much as I hate to say this, I actually would disagree with you on Patrick Mahomes. I think he's by far the best athlete that plays quarterback, and he makes the most plays, if that makes sense. But I think the best quarterback right now is Joe Burrow.
[01:03:06] Speaker A: Are you saying that Patrick Mahomes is a better athlete than Jalen Hurts?
[01:03:11] Speaker B: I am, yes.
[01:03:12] Speaker A: That's what you're going with?
[01:03:13] Speaker B: Yeah, I am saying that. You don't have to say that. I'm saying that I know you picked the Eagles, and I'm an Eagles fan riding that train all playoffs long, and you love Jalen Hurts all.
[01:03:27] Speaker A: So you're a big fan. Look, I just don't want to get curbstomped like hitchBOT.
[01:03:31] Speaker B: That's true. Look, be nice. I think Randall Cunningham is not around anymore.
[01:03:37] Speaker A: I think McColl Herdman is out for this week.
I think Cadarius Tony has been battling.
[01:03:46] Speaker B: Battled injuries all year, but injuries all year healthy the last few games, I.
[01:03:49] Speaker A: Don'T think that's accurate. I think he's still scored touchdowns. You can score touchdowns and still be hurt. Patrick Mahomes has a high ankle sprain.
[01:03:56] Speaker B: He's not hurt.
[01:03:57] Speaker A: I'm pretty sure he's on the injury report.
[01:03:58] Speaker B: They're fine.
Pause.
He'll be fine. Do you have any more cool things.
[01:04:10] Speaker A: To say like Cadarius Tony's not even practicing this week because he's injured. He's fine.
[01:04:15] Speaker B: He'll be fine.
[01:04:16] Speaker A: So I think those things because here's the deal. Kansas City has a lot of weapons, so the more of them that aren't in the game that's true.
[01:04:23] Speaker B: That's true. The one thing that they do have is a lot of weapons. So if you start taking them away.
[01:04:28] Speaker A: The one thing that can help the.
[01:04:30] Speaker B: Eagles here let's be honest here, though.
Pat Mahomes picked apart the NFL this year with McColl, Hardman, and a bunch of other guys, pacheco, Valdez Scantling, or whatever his name, like all these guys that Pacheco like, guys I've never heard.
So at least you've heard of but you've heard of, because they're just okay, all right, fine.
[01:04:51] Speaker A: Here's the thing. You want analysis?
[01:04:53] Speaker B: Here's my I want it. I've been waiting for it, and you keep give me analysis.
[01:04:57] Speaker A: The Chiefs led the NFL in yards per pass attempt. Philadelphia's defense led the NFL in fewest yards allowed per pass attempt.
[01:05:06] Speaker B: Something's got to give.
[01:05:07] Speaker A: Something has to give. And defense wins championships. On the other side of that, Philadelphia is 14. And when they run for more than.
[01:05:14] Speaker B: 100 yards, you think they run for.
[01:05:17] Speaker A: More than 100 yards in this game? Yes. With Jalen Hurts in Super Bowl, he'll probably run for 100 himself. So that's my prediction, is that this game is going to be a high scoring affair, but I think Philadelphia runs the ball better at the end of the day, and they can control the clock.
[01:05:37] Speaker B: Let me get this straight. Your three predictions are patrick Mahomes will be held in check.
[01:05:44] Speaker A: To an extent. I think it'll be high scoring game.
[01:05:46] Speaker B: Number two, Jalen Hurts, runs for over 100 yards.
[01:05:50] Speaker A: Yes.
[01:05:51] Speaker B: And number three, Philadelphia wins.
[01:05:54] Speaker A: Jalen may only get to like 92.
[01:05:56] Speaker B: Oh, now you're came in strong.
[01:05:59] Speaker A: Stand for that. Jalen Hurd is running for 100 yards.
[01:06:01] Speaker B: Okay, my next quote was going to be now I feel a little bit less secure saying this, but strong words from a strong man. Kenny Thunder shows no mercy.
[01:06:10] Speaker A: Fat words from a fat man.
[01:06:13] Speaker B: Fine. But a couple of cool facts that I had about the Super Bowl, since you didn't give us any.
What do you mean?
[01:06:22] Speaker A: I just gave you cool facts.
[01:06:23] Speaker B: You didn't give me any. For the first time ever, both teams will have a black starting quarterback. So it's a pretty big moment.
[01:06:32] Speaker A: And it's Black History Month.
[01:06:35] Speaker B: It is Black History Month.
[01:06:36] Speaker A: Yeah, this was kind of obviously there's been a bunch of stuff written about that this week.
It's strange, but understandable. I mean, when you think about the NFL today in our lifetime, it's such these teams are amalgamations of black and white and everything in between.
And we've seen black quarterbacks since basically our whole lives.
We've never known an NFL that didn't have black quarterbacks. So to me it was at first glance, like, surprising that the Super Bowl has never had two black quarterbacks. But then on the other side of.
[01:07:17] Speaker B: That, mind you, we're in our mid thirty s, and not long before we were born, or probably when we were really young, that wasn't well, and that's what I'm saying.
[01:07:24] Speaker A: So to me, just thinking it shocked me at first. Thinking that just seems like that's almost impossible because we've seen so many good black quarterbacks in our lifetime. But to your point, you go back and you think about pre Warren Moon, and there was a time when black quarterbacks teams weren't letting black people be quarterbacks. That was just from I'm glad that.
[01:07:50] Speaker B: The NFL has learned and grown still got a ways to go in a number of areas, but I'm glad that the NFL is in a much better place than they used to.
[01:07:59] Speaker A: So, yeah, I mean, either way, like.
[01:08:02] Speaker B: You said, historic moment, another historic moment. First time ever that brothers will play each other in the Super Bowl. And this is actually a really fun fact, too, because that's the Kelsey brothers. We mentioned it just a few minutes ago, and they're from right here in Northeast Ohio. They went to Cleveland Heights High School and then they went on to Cincinnati for college, which Kenny loves.
[01:08:23] Speaker A: The city of Cincinnati, the worst college in the planet.
They don't have any good programs. Their mess hall is terrible.
[01:08:30] Speaker B: Let's put this on. Let's just get it going again. So, Kenny, who you got in the Super Bowl? I don't need to ask you who you got.
[01:08:40] Speaker A: There's not even a lot of green spaces for picnics and things still on Cincinnati. Who you got? Who do I got? I got the eagles because I'm riding with the eagles. I am going to go Eagles 41 38.
[01:08:56] Speaker B: Damn, that's going to be a game. If it's 41 38. I'm going to be so excited.
[01:09:00] Speaker A: Yeah, it's going to be a fun game.
[01:09:01] Speaker B: I'm going to go with the Chiefs. I think the fact that Patrick Mahomes is healthy, or at least seems to be healthy again and had the two weeks off is a big deal and it's hard to stop the Patrick Mahomes to Travis Kelsey duo.
[01:09:17] Speaker A: Well, you've never seen the best defense in the NFL do it fair, but.
[01:09:20] Speaker B: I'm going to go with the Chiefs and I'm going to go 42 no, I'm going to go 35 to 24.
[01:09:28] Speaker A: It's usually a lower scoring game in Super Bowl.
[01:09:30] Speaker B: I'm going to go 35 24. The defense has come to play unless the Patriots come back and beat the Falcons.
[01:09:37] Speaker A: But I think this could be very much like the Chiefs Rams game from a couple of years ago, which is back and forth. A lot of exciting stuff going on fair.
[01:09:46] Speaker B: And then finally in our football segment.
[01:09:50] Speaker A: Here in other NFL news yeah.
[01:09:52] Speaker B: Aaron Rodgers looks to be done in Green Bay. I just thought that was a pretty big deal. Like, they just have basically, like, Green Bay's put it out there that they're looking to trade him.
[01:10:00] Speaker A: So this one's interesting because I do think that Aaron Rodgers wants to play another year. I think there's always something in the back of Rogers'mind that he got a late start, which is true that I.
[01:10:16] Speaker B: Think he was in the same situation that he's now putting.
[01:10:20] Speaker A: Think that I don't think that he would.
[01:10:23] Speaker B: Do you think he's just like sticking it to Jordan love for him, getting it stuck to him by Bret early in his career?
[01:10:28] Speaker A: I mean, when I heard him on with McAfee a week or two, like, I think he's just resigned to the fact that as an organization changes and wants to go in a different direction, that's fine.
And he hopes that if there is a split that they can part amicably, which is fine. But I think he's starting to accept that he won't be a Green Bay packer.
But I do think that he wants to continue to play.
So it'll be interesting to see what happens because there's a lot of teams, I'm sure that would love for Aaron Rodgers to be their quarterback this year. I do think he'll hold out as long as humanly possible to decide whether or not he's going to keep playing or not because he loves the attention. But I would be shocked if aaron Rodgers did what Tom Brady did last week.
[01:11:20] Speaker B: Yeah. So that's the next one. First of all, before we get there, does the biggest question that you left off, does Aaron Rodgers take his girl with him?
[01:11:26] Speaker A: Shailene? Yeah.
Look, I haven't seen anything about Shailene Woodley in the headlines recently, but I search them every.
[01:11:38] Speaker B: Yeah, so you mentioned Tom Brady in this past week. He did retire for a second time this past week. Gronk tweeted them. He said, welcome to the two times retired club. He said, I'm not going to write a big long thing about you this time. Just welcome to the two times retired club.
[01:11:54] Speaker A: Out of nowhere, too.
[01:11:56] Speaker B: On the beach just down there, just hanging out. He just retired, made a video by himself since he has no wife or kids anymore, and said, hey guys, I'm retiring.
Which brings me to I said, he was on the beach down there, and somebody went to the found the spot, put sand in a jar, and it is currently on sale on ebay for the bid is up to over a hundred thousand dollars.
[01:12:24] Speaker A: We got to get that sand, bro.
[01:12:25] Speaker B: We got to go get more. There's plenty of sand there. There's literally plenty of sand there.
[01:12:29] Speaker A: Start a GoFundMe. I want Tom Brady's. Sand.
[01:12:31] Speaker B: Yeah, but yeah. So a couple of quick fun facts about Tom Brady and his career here.
His total football earnings are 332,000,000, which is a lot. It's a lot of money over the course of his career.
Well, what people don't know is he'll be starting his career with Fox Sports as an analyst in 2024, commentator, whatever he's going to be, his contract for Fox Sports is over ten years, 375,000,000. Biggest ever for commentator, analyst, whatever he's going to be. And so in ten years, he's going to make more money than he made in his 20 year NFL career.
[01:13:16] Speaker A: It's also a lot of money.
[01:13:17] Speaker B: Yeah. Ton of money.
[01:13:18] Speaker A: It's all a lot of money.
Can I make a quick prediction about Tom Brady as a sportscaster?
We might have to save this clip for a while because it won't be proven true for a minute, but let me hear it. I think that initially people will love Tom Brady. I think he's going to get old really quickly, and Fox is going to be like, why did we give this guy a ten year contract? I think you've already seen the same thing with Tony Romo. His stick at first when he was fresh out of the league, he was.
[01:13:50] Speaker B: Spot on him and what's his name? You could tell there's tension in the booth there.
[01:13:55] Speaker A: Yeah. Because the word on the street is he's not prepping for shows anymore. He's not even prepping for the games. He just is just resting on his laurels that I'm Tony Romo and people love me. It's kind of like his career, but those first ten games that he brought, and he could just tell you the exact I mean, it was a shtick, but it was cool.
[01:14:15] Speaker B: Now it's just kind of annoying.
[01:14:16] Speaker A: He's just kind of lazy now. I mean, there was a story literally last week that the media execs had tried to stage an intervention with him to be like, Tony, you got to do some game prep, because you're coming off like when when they played the Bengals, the Browns play the Bengals, and he called it he was like, what is it, Jim? It's the Red River showdown. Jim was like, Battle of Ohio. Battle of Ohio.
[01:14:45] Speaker B: Yeah, so there's that. I mean, I don't disagree with you. I could see that happening. But real quick, here one more tidbit about Tom Brady. Tom Brady made the championship game 70% of the time that he was in the NFL. All QBs in the NFL complete, on average, 64% of their passes in 2022. So Tom Brady is more likely or I'm sorry, Tom Brady made the conference championship game in those times. So Tom Brady is more likely to take his team to the conference championship game than a quarterback is to complete a pass in the NFL.
[01:15:21] Speaker A: That's accurate.
[01:15:22] Speaker B: That's insane. That's, like, the most ridiculous stat I've ever he's he's.
[01:15:27] Speaker A: You get into this same conversation like you do with Jordan and LeBron.
Is he the goat? Is he not the goat? I don't care at this point. I know that he's the best quarterback that I've ever seen play football.
[01:15:41] Speaker B: It's been a lot of fun watching.
[01:15:42] Speaker A: Him, and I'm disappointed in my younger self for not liking him, not liking just appreciating what I was watching. But as I grew into a young man and you start to realize you're never going to see this again, the.
[01:15:58] Speaker B: First time that I remember embracing it and you were still fighting it was against the Giants in the Super Bowl. And I was like, I want him to go undefeated, because, heck, I was just like, he's the greatest quarterback that's ever played. As much as I want to fight it, he is, and I just want him to complete the perfect season. But he didn't.
[01:16:16] Speaker A: It was a couple of years after that for me before I even realized.
[01:16:19] Speaker B: That was the year.
[01:16:20] Speaker A: Now that it's over, it's like, man, but is it over? Is the question.
[01:16:25] Speaker B: I think it's over.
[01:16:26] Speaker A: You think so?
I'm not so sure it's over.
[01:16:31] Speaker B: You're not?
[01:16:32] Speaker A: I don't think he'll be on a team during training camp this year.
I think that if there's a team that has a good football team, that.
[01:16:42] Speaker B: All we got to do is wait what was it, 60 days that loses it loses. Figure out if it's over, loses a.
[01:16:47] Speaker A: Quarterback early mid to the season that he could win another Super Bowl at.
I think he'll stay in shape for this year, and he'll be ready to go if someone calls.
[01:16:57] Speaker B: I think he just realized that he wrecked it all. He's like, damn it, I should have retired last year.
[01:17:01] Speaker A: He should have retired after he won the Super Bowl, Tampa Bay, and just been done with it. But anyways, I'm not done talking about Tom Brady.
[01:17:09] Speaker B: You love Tom Brady. We just talked about how you were a denier for so long and now you love Tom Brady.
[01:17:14] Speaker A: And now I'm a lover. I'm a Tommy lover.
My final point, it is a podcast. We don't just have to rush through it is, was Tom maybe playing 40 chess this whole time? Like, did he intentionally unretire piss Giselle off, force her to be the bad guy and leave and take the kids? And now he's like, I play golf all day and date supermodels.
[01:17:40] Speaker B: He is a big golfer and he likes to just hang out and do what he wants.
[01:17:45] Speaker A: And did you see his selfie that he posted today on Insta? No, just him in his underwear, just in like a beachfront mansion, just hand ever so slightly in front of his manhood.
[01:17:57] Speaker B: And he's like, oh, by the way, I made $332,000,000 in my career.
[01:18:00] Speaker A: As handsome and shredded as ever.
[01:18:02] Speaker B: And I've got a skeletor like face.
[01:18:05] Speaker A: Just saying it's not beyond the possibility.
[01:18:09] Speaker B: Fair. Before we close the show out, want to remind you one more time to call into the Burn River Sportscast. I think call us at 3302-2780-8033-0227-8080-3302-278.
Call us. Talk about the browns. Talk about the cavs. Talk about the guardians. Talk about Cleveland sports. Talk about pop culture. Sing me a song. Write me a letter and then read it.
Do whatever you want. Just make it entertaining. And we'll put it on air.
[01:18:43] Speaker A: That was the most unenthusiastic you didn't chime in.
[01:18:49] Speaker B: You did nothing.
[01:18:50] Speaker A: You just sat there plug for the Burning River Sportscast outtake hotline that I've ever heard. It sounded like you were literally asleep. You were like, don't forget to call the Burning River.
[01:19:01] Speaker B: Should we redo it now? It's over. Call the Burning River sports guest hotday. Got line 3302-2780-8033-0227-8003-3022-78. So, Kenny, what can we expect next week?
[01:19:17] Speaker A: Yo, dog, let me tell you, we're going to recap this Super Bowl nice.
[01:19:20] Speaker B: Randy Jackson did nice.
[01:19:21] Speaker A: Why do you have Randy Jackson's autograph on a martial arts website? We're going to recap this Super Bowl game. I hear it's supposed to be pretty big.
And then we will continue to bring you the best coverage of all Browns news and other Cleveland sports topics.
[01:19:37] Speaker B: Cool.
So don't forget to follow us on social media. Tap in Media is on Facebook and Twitter at the Tap in Media and on Instagram at Tap in Media official and burning river sportscast. That's this podcast. We are on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube at Burning River Sportscast and on Twitter at Burning River Pod.
[01:19:58] Speaker A: Pod.
[01:19:59] Speaker B: And you can find our podcast wherever you get your podcasts. That's Apple podcasts spotify. Google Podcasts, amazon Music, stitcher Pandora, iHeartRadio PocketCasts Castro good pods and so many more Added one there. You didn't see that.
[01:20:14] Speaker A: Good pods, huh?
[01:20:15] Speaker B: Yeah, social media for podcasts. Basically. Pretty cool.
[01:20:18] Speaker A: Okay.
[01:20:19] Speaker B: Gave them their own plug. You're welcome. Good pods.
[01:20:21] Speaker A: You're just good pies.
[01:20:24] Speaker B: All right, what do you got for us? It's time for actual days.
Nobody is more excited than you that this got its own sounder. We get to sign off with facts for days.
[01:20:39] Speaker A: I've made it such a good sounder, too.
Someone killed me. So we're going to start out over here and then we're going to work our way back into football with these facts for Days.
[01:20:51] Speaker B: Let's go first.
[01:20:53] Speaker A: Why are barnes red?
[01:20:57] Speaker B: I don't know. I was going to take a swing.
[01:20:59] Speaker A: At it, but I better you didn't. So hundreds of years ago, farmers painted their barns with linseed oil to help seal the wood and keep it from rotting. And then they mixed rust in with the oil to keep the fungi and moss from growing on the wood. And this turned the oil red.
And barns today are still painted red in honor of this tradition. So most people just paint their barns red not knowing that with, like, paint.
[01:21:24] Speaker B: It already does all those things.
[01:21:26] Speaker A: Yeah, but they're just like barns are red, so then they paint them red. Barns are red. That's why.
[01:21:32] Speaker B: Fun fact.
[01:21:33] Speaker A: Fun fact. Facts for days. Here to Burning River. Sports gas.
[01:21:36] Speaker B: Hot.
[01:21:36] Speaker A: Take hotline. Oh, this is not the hot take hotline. This is Burning River sports gas. Facts for days.
[01:21:40] Speaker B: The Eagles logo is a thing across the bottom that says Facts for Days.
[01:21:44] Speaker A: Now I can make one this week.
[01:21:46] Speaker B: All right, let's do it.
[01:21:46] Speaker A: I'll put it here right now.
[01:21:49] Speaker B: Wow, that's incredible.
[01:21:50] Speaker A: Yeah.
[01:21:53] Speaker B: You missed the first fact. What was the first fact?
[01:21:57] Speaker A: Barnes are red. Nice.
[01:21:58] Speaker B: All right, go on.
[01:22:01] Speaker A: The Eagles logo is the only left facing logo that needed special permission by the NFL because it's got this goofy e in it.
[01:22:13] Speaker B: There's an e in it?
[01:22:14] Speaker A: Yeah. You just looked at it, bro it's right.
[01:22:20] Speaker B: Now.
[01:22:21] Speaker A: I haven't actually personally validated that it's the only left facing logo, but that's what I've been told.
[01:22:27] Speaker B: Facts for day.
[01:22:28] Speaker A: Usually I try to validate these a little more, but because it's a Super Bowl and Eagles are in it, I was like, yeah, I'll take that. That's fine.
So there's that.
And then finally, let me leave you with a few Super Bowl facts. Since we only get to do this once a year.
Let's hear it when it's a Super Bowl. So the first thing is if you're going to head to Phoenix this weekend for the game, I won't. But bring one your pocketbook because the average price of a Super Bowl ticket is $9,927.
[01:23:03] Speaker B: Wow. It's going to be so much more expensive if the Browns ever make it.
[01:23:06] Speaker A: That is twice as expensive as last year's tickets.
The lowest price, the worst seat in the stadium went for $5,738.
Who goes to these games?
Who goes to them.
[01:23:23] Speaker B: The Kardashians.
Davidson.
[01:23:27] Speaker A: The kardashians. It's estimated that 103 and a half million Americans plan to throw or attend a Super Bowl party.
[01:23:36] Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. Why wouldn't you?
[01:23:39] Speaker A: And let's talk a little bit about the food one.
[01:23:44] Speaker B: Tell me about it.
[01:23:45] Speaker A: Zero point 45 billion chicken wings will be eaten on Sunday.
[01:23:53] Speaker B: And 1.2 billion will be from you.
[01:23:57] Speaker A: Because I'm so fat.
I killed him. 10 million pounds of ribs are sold the week of the Super Bowl. 11.2 million pounds of potato chips and 139 and a half million avocados will.
[01:24:13] Speaker B: Be purchased for guacamole avocados from Mexico.
Just put an ad in our show.
[01:24:20] Speaker A: Good job.
Three out of every four Americans admit to eating more during the Super Bowl than any other sporting event or party.
[01:24:29] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:24:31] Speaker A: 51.7 million cases of beer are sold on Super Bowl Sunday. On Super Bowl Sunday.
Not the weekly I'll be one of those.
90% more beer is consumed on Super Bowl Sunday than an average day.
[01:24:51] Speaker B: So if you wonder why there's so many beer commercials during the Super Bowl.
[01:24:55] Speaker A: And if you wonder why the Monday after the Super Bowl feels worse than it is, it's probably because you're doing a lot more work. Because 16.1 million people will call off work the day after the Super Bowl.
[01:25:08] Speaker B: Oh, yeah.
[01:25:09] Speaker A: Which accounts for about $6.5 billion in lost productivity annually. Sticking it to the man.
And that, friends, is facts for days.
[01:25:20] Speaker B: That's what I like to hear.
[01:25:23] Speaker A: Yeah.
So that's good. This is fun.
[01:25:28] Speaker B: This is fun.
[01:25:29] Speaker A: One bonus fact.
Bonus fact. Commercials are big. Super bowl takeaway. Total ad time during the Super Bowl this year is scheduled for 39 minutes and 30 seconds. It's down from 42 minutes and 15 seconds the previous year.
And if you're going to be a problem, don't just be a part of the problem, be the whole damn problem.
[01:25:53] Speaker B: And only you can prevent river fires.
[01:26:00] Speaker A: Burning river sports.
[01:26:03] Speaker B: You know, is it just me, or have the Super Bowl commercials gotten worse?
[01:26:09] Speaker A: They're not getting better.
[01:26:11] Speaker B: No, they need to do better.
[01:26:17] Speaker A: Did we buy an ad spot?
[01:26:19] Speaker B: No.
[01:26:19] Speaker A: Absolutely. We didn't buy one.
[01:26:21] Speaker B: No. With all our revenue.
[01:26:23] Speaker A: Yeah, we're living in high on the hog, bra.
[01:26:25] Speaker B: No, we're not burning river sportscast. No ads in the Super Bowl.
[01:26:29] Speaker A: You'll have to find us on the Sportscast gastros, Google, Podcast, Spot Advisor, wherever we get your podcast. Good cast. Burning river.
I got you, bro, because you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight. I drove an $80,000 BMW. That's my name. Everyone in this room is now dumber. But I'm funny how? I mean, funny like I'm a clown. AMUSU. Man, I'm glad I called that guy.
[01:27:05] Speaker B: Swanson. Swanson. Maybe it's on the briefcase.
[01:27:08] Speaker A: Look, another oh, yeah, it's right here. Samsonite. I was way off. I knew it started with an S, though.
[01:27:22] Speaker B: Today's episode was brought to you by Topath Gin. Topath Gin, a true craft American gin made in its. Own style. A blend of nine botanicals brings a moderate amount of juniper with a citrus backbone. Layers of seven other botanicals shine through for this incredibly well balanced and high quality, small batch topath gin gin.
